I get kind of embarrassed when adults and/or people i don't know tell me they've heard my music. The reason is mainly because humans only hear what they want to or (more importantly) DON'T want to hear. Parents only hear the swear words, for example. It's like bad language is a barrier to the discovery of content or purpose for adults. I don't know, it's hard for me to try to really grasp the emotion I seek to grasp with music when my available dialect is limited. What do I say when i'm mad? "FUCK!!" It shouldn't be a taboo word to bring up during artistic expression, in my honest opinion. That being said, the reality is that society isn't ready to take rap for what it is, because there is so many negative aspects of life that rap encompasses, too. Violence, crime, drugs/alcohol... all shit that ALL of us will be exposed to, but that none of us are really comfortable talking to our parents about. Well.. my parents hear my music.
This leaves me in a weird position. I've always prided myself on keeping only truth in my music, but by doing so, i'm exposing things that certain people that keep me in high regards, such as my parents, aren't comfortable hearing. So, is one expected to "keep it real" or fabricate (and/or keep out certain details) in order to not offend. I don't have an answer...
What i do know is that pursuing a rap career, and maintaining a normal family life are not synonymous. And, if and WHEN i'm forced to choose between the two, i'm gonna sacrifice music in order to have that normal life. So, like, this potential Rhymesayers connection is really awesome and extremely flattering for me, but i don't think i'm as deserving (nor wanting) of it as others... Music as merely a way for me to get rid of some of my angst at the current time. Do i think i'm good? No better than anyone else... I make music that appeases my own interests. Lil' B makes music that appeases his own interests... Nobody is good, nobody is bad. They just are.
So, my music "career" as unsuccessful it was, by MOST of your standards (not mine), is hitting the decrescendo pretty soon here. It was an awesome chapter in my life, but I have a ton of more important shit in life to focus on, and i'm happy with that. I've loved the joy music has brought me and the feedback that you guys have gave me. I hope i've been able to bring some joy to you guys too...
Anyways, I still have "The Thomas Lake Mixtape" coming out pretty soon, which i hope you guys will like. It was super fun to write, because it took me back to a lot of good pre-teen memories; a lot of times i cherish dearly. It's a 17 song project (i currently have 13 songs completed). I'm hoping to make a video or two for it too, but they might not release until after the actual project. So, here's my question for you guys.... out of the available titles for songs, tell me which one you want for me to release?!!!:
Needle Drop, Vibe To It, Kinestethics Remix, Sun Will Rise, Gradual, Love Til September, General Custer.
Whichever title gets the most love, i will release the track at some point this week.
Wednesdays w/ Jack this week: All Of The Lights.
thanks for reading
-Jack
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